Should I start my own business?

It is probably one of the biggest questions you could ask yourself  'Should I start my own business?' because it truly can be life changing.

You start to have that type of niggiling feeling.  Seeing others you know who are taking the leap to quit their jobs and start to work for themselves.  From what you know and have heard it is hard work but in return you get freedom and flexibility to work when and where you want.  To decide your own working hours. 

But on the other side, the dark side, you have been told that it takes over your life.  That to have any kind of success you have to live and breathe your business, you have to sacrifice the things you love the most such as time with your family and work double the amount of hours you would in your full time employment.

And there's the perks you leave behind - the paid holidays, sick days, guaranteed salary, stability and financial security.

Now this last part really gets me going.  That as business owners we are not seen to have a secure income, yet if you work for someone else you are.  That person you work for also needs to make sure they pay your wages and their own.  So actually having more control over what you can potentially earn, seems to me to be more secure than working for someone else when you think about it?

But how do you know if it's the right time to start a business?

The first thing to do is to find out what you are really passionate about, because without passion it is really hard to keep your motivation high on those days when it can be really tough.

The four questions you can ask yourself are:

• "Why do I want to work for myself?".  Explore your values around this and what is your key driving force?  Family, flexibility, potential to earn more income, freedom to work in different places, make a difference and an impact on others..... what is your driver?

• "What am I really passionate about?".  What are the things you could talk all night about and not get bored (you might bore others but who cares because you love it).

• "What are my strengths, skills and experience that I can bring to a business?".  Think about what work you have done really well before.  What do you love about work and how can your skills help you with a business opportunity?

• "What problem can I help to solve?".  What problem can you see in the area that you are passionate about, a gap in the market, or feel you can do something way better than it's being done now - explore that further.

When you have answers to these four things then you know you are on your way to creating something amazing.  This is when the "What if's" will kick in and that fear of failure.  What if it all goes wrong, what if is a complete flop and I don't have what it takes.

Having confidence and self belief is the cornerstone to a successful business. 

Yes it's important to get your branding, marketing and positioning right - but these things aren't to be used as excuses for not getting yourself out there and just starting.  Telling people about your plans , sharing your excitement and making new connections is the best way to get your business off to a flying start - the other stuff will then fall into place so don't hide behind the fact that you don't have a webiste yet.

Don't waste a shed load of time, money and energy on all of this stuff when you are still figuring it all out.  Trust me once you start you will grow and evolve and so will your business.  Even business names change, so make it easy on yourself and don't feel immense pressure to get everything perfect - it doesn't exist and you will get yourself in a right tizz worrying about that!

Don't let the start stop you - you can do this and will realise that, just as soon as you decide to go for it!

Gx

**Gemma Stow works with female entrepreneurs who are introverts and are ready to take themselves and their business to the next level.  To find their fierce and take that all important action.  As well as private coaching, she runs a membership called Club Fierce that gives that personal touch to women who are looking for support, accountability and an environment that breeds self belief and results.  More info HERE. **

#Stop Comparing Yours to Theirs.

Comparison is the thief of joy.  That's what they say - what do you think?

I can really understand this statement and it can be very overwhelming when you start to compare yourself to others and the impact that this can have on how you truly feel about yourself.

I did a #FierceTalk was on this very subject - if you missed it check it out.

Comparing where you are right now with someone else in a negative way is not good for you.  Especially when you use it to find faults with yourself.

The problem is that you don't recognise your own strengths and beauty as you are far too busy comparing yourself to others.

You start to feel undeserving, inadequate and inexperienced.  Who am I to do this? I don't have what she has? I am not good enough who will listen to me?

Do you find you do this?  We all do it at times and it can be detrimental to our self esteem.  If this becomes a habit then we start to lose confidence in our own abilities and the pressure and overwhelm creeps in and we stop moving forwards - we give up, we think what's the point?

Social media has only served to increase these feelings if we allow it to.  Do you know what I mean? Watching someone else's movie reel and all their highlights about what they are up to!  The thing to remember is that it is only their highlights - not everyone would have the lady balls to show up and show off their down days - those moments where everything has gone to shit.  It isn't easy sharing this with the world because of the fear of being judged - what will they think of me if I do show up and I haven't got my shit together?

Constant comparing of this nature will not end well.

Constantly comparing yourself to others in a negative way can lead to depression and anxiety because you ultimately tell yourself you have a shit life because it is not like those other people's lives you see on your phone.  Now there is a sentence I wouldn't have thought I would write - but it is so true.  We have all been there and I know you have too.

Well it is time to stop.  

You have an incredible life and can use it to inspire others.

Firstly you cannot compare your chapter 1 to somebody else's chapter 20.  It just doesn't work like that.  Of course there will be differences, of course they will have experienced more things, and you will too as you create more chapters in your life.  

Secondly, at least you have a chapter 1 right?  There will be others comparing themselves to you too - only thinking about starting to follow their dreams, but are too scared to show up yet.  They don't even have a chapter and will look to you and be amazed by how you did it.

I was watching my 8 year old daughter in her dance class last night.  I love seeing her dance and the passion she has.  She shows determination and commitment and never misses a class.  

She does get concerned about how far the other girls have got and how they can do this move and that move and she can't.  But what was interesting last night was that another little girl was asked to do the finale move - an amazing cartwheel without hands - which she was brilliant at but only on soft mats.  

The tutor wanted her to practice it on the hard floor ready for the real competition.  Se was scared to do it.  She cried.  Her dance class buddies were all staring at her, and then out of nowhere, they started clapping - it gives me goosebumps to relive it to be honest.  

It was amazing to watch.  Her girls had her back.  She knew it.  And she bloody did it.  And yes all the girls were probably thinking they wish they could do that move (I know my daughter was) but they didn't sit there feeling negative towards their team mate - they encouraged her to be the best version of herself, to push her out of that comfort zone, to do the thing she really wanted to do, because that is what is needed in these times where we think we can't go on.  

We need encouragement.  Which by definition is the action of giving someone support, confidence and hope.

And all those other girls who did the encouraging will feel a sense of satisfaction knowing that when their time comes they will have a huge team of other girls who will encourage them to do the same.  It's bloody inspirational and it is what I am all about.

Watching that unravel last night brought me to tears because it kinda sums up everything I stand for.  
 

Women having each other's back.  

So yes you may feel that someone is better than you and maybe they are further on their journey - but remember they were once where you are right now, and there are others who are only dreaming of being where you are.  

It is time to stop the negative comparison BS.

And instead start using comparison to your advantage.  Truly believe that if she can do it then it is possible for you too.  

Don't forget that.  

If someone is paving the way for you then this is a great thing, as it means that you can run along that path knowing full well what will be at the end of it.
 

Her success is definitely not your failure - it is only your beginning.

FM x

If you have not yet joined our amazing group of Fiercemums then come on over. 

And if you are ready to figure out what you really want and to discover that passion you can turn into work you love then grab my free gift here.

#Find the Confidence.

So do you consider yourself to be a confident person ...depends on what you are doing?  Yeah me too.
 

We are all confident in some things and less so in others.  It is only natural.  The key is to figure out what you don't feel as confident in and face that fear.

This is a big deal for us mums as having babies and starting a family can sometimes knock your confidence.  Spending so much time being obsessed with everything baby while you are pregnant and then obsessed with everything new mum and baby after your little bundle of joy arrives is a whole life change to adjust too.  Having time off from your normal work and social circles can really take its toll on your self confidence.  

For me it was such a shock and a massive learning curve becoming a mum that I doubted myself straight away.  I didn't think I was cut out to be a 'good enough' mum and I know this can happen to so many like minded professional women who are so used to being control of their own lives, and then your little bundle of joy throws all that out of the window.  It can be a scary time.  The unknown.  But then that is true for most things we are unsure about.

If you haven't done something before then your primal brain starts telling you to be fearful and on alert as this could hurt you.  

You decide to fight, flight or freeze.  If you decide to fight and do it anyway and don't get hurt, your brain gets the message that 'ok I didn't die so maybe this isn't as dangerous or scary as I first thought' - the more you do it, the more you grow in confidence.

Taking action is the best way to reduce your fear.

Are there times that you can think of << Test First Name >> where you have felt like this or experienced something similar?  I have lots.  And I know the women I work with are often trapped by fears that they don't even know exist.  I was for years until I decided to figure myself out.

I have been live on my Facebook Business page every evening to share a tip to give yourself that boost of confidence when you need it.  If you have missed them go take a look and let me know what you think.  

I would love you to share any thoughts or experiences on growing our confidence in our amazing group of supportive ambitious mums.

Remember - If you can dream it then you can do it.  Anything is possible.

You've totally got this.

Love FM
x